it's the way i burst from 0 to 1, the way my face muscles tense up, my eyes glaze over & the sides of my mouth droop down. it's the way i've suddenly adopted an air of a bratty princess, where not even one thing can be given up for anyone else. the way you have to sit down & console me over the pettiest thing, something i know is minute & dumb yet here i am anyway pouting & being a spoiled bitch about it. it's the way that i'm becoming those girls i used to make fun of (& still gladly would), the girls who blew up over the silliest things, too attached & too desperate.
but it's the way (& you know, this is the way) i can't help but be everything i feel with you. it's the circular logic that for anything that remotely upsets me, you'll be there to lean on, to talk me through...& so i continue to let loose every ounce of emotion in me, depending on you to be there: because you have always been there. & frankly it's quite scary, having someone paying attention to every movement on my easy-to-read face, someone who cares enough to want to see a smile again. & so after years of closing off my emotions to the world, here i am letting it pour out all at once...
it's the way i can take off this mask, letting myself be the bratty clingy overanalyzing girl if that's how i really am. how maybe i don't love everything under this skin, but all the while i found you. & you do.
